We live in a great era of Transformers. When I came back to collecting the toys in 2004, it was returning from a 16 year hiatus where I paid little to no attention to what’s going on with the toyline. Now in 2020, I’ve been recollecting for 16 years, as long as my hiatus. Time flies.

Hasbro certainly did not forget us older fans that grew up with the franchise. CHUG (Classics, Henkei, Universe, Generations) draws inspiration mostly from G1. Many G1 favorites were updated in the line, sometimes multiple times.

CHUG obviously started with some of the most popular characters, like Optimus Prime, Megatron, and Bumblebee. And as the years went, more and more would be updated. Characters from the first 2 G1 seasons usually got earlier treatment. G1 Movie characters would soon follow. Even more obscure characters would later get updated. I wrote back in 2009 how I wished Sixshot would get an update, then in 2017 it became reality.

Now as I write this in 2020, and looking back, Hasbro has updated some TFs that seem as if they were reaching for the bottom of the G1 barrel. For example, they updated Jumpstarters (both Topspin and Twin Twist). They updated Duocons (Battletrap and Flywheels). Heck, they even did all the Monsterbots (Doublecross, Grotusque, Repugnus). I can think of way better G1 characters to update. And that’s where I got the inspiration for this post. I present below my top 10 G1 Transformers that desperately need an update today.

But first, some ground rules:

• I am not including any Pretenders. They suck.
• I am not including any Action Masters. They suck too.
• This list is for G1 TFs that got no update whatsoever. Even if a TF got a lame repaint of something else, or got revived as a Micron (like Titan Masters), or got a completely butchered Movie-verse update, that counts as an update. Yes I know that not having a real G1-style update sucks, but not having being updated at all sucks more. This list is reserved for the latter.
• There are G1 TFs where there’s no update now, but their update is coming. These TFs are not included.
• I am not counting 3rd or 4th party products. Only official products are considered

Here we go.

10. Hosehead
Allegiance: Autobot
Sub-Group: Headmaster
Function: Emergency Rescue
Modes: robot, fire engine
 
 

You think there would be an update to Hosehead by now. He is a Headmaster that came around in Season 5, and he transforms into a fire engine. Hasbro LOVES making repaints out of something simply because two characters share the same alt mode. Inferno has been repainted into Hot Spot so many times that I lost count. How about giving some love to Hosehead. Yeah I realize no one outside of G1 has heard of him. But this is too easy to not do. And we all know Hasbro loves easy and quick cash grabs. Admittedly, I had Hosehead in G1. He’s still in pretty good shape. Yes I’m partial to TFs that I own, but this is my blog, so there.
 
 

9. Dogfight
Allegiance: Autobot
Sub-Group: Triggerbot
Function: Aerial Combat
Modes: robot, jet
 
 

I must have a Triggerbot or Triggercon on this list. In G1 there were 3 Triggerbots (the good guys) and 3 Triggercons (the baddies), and I never had any. My favorite out of the 6 is Ruckus, a Triggercon. I wanted to put him on here, but then discovered that he was technically updated. He had a lame Transformers Figure Subscription Service update, being repainted from Combiner Wars Offroad. And worse, they called him Grabuge. Seriously?! Can Hasbro make him anymore trashy? But that technically counts as having being updated, so I went to my next favorite in this group of 6: Dogfight. I don’t know that much about Dogfight, but I do remember him having a scene in one of the IDW comics. In that scene, he was talking to the great Optimus Prime. And Optimus seems to not know who he is, hahaha! It’s refreshing to see that not all Transformers know each other, a concept that the G1 cartoons never explored. Anyways, he transforms into a jet with forward-swept wings. Similar to Conquest X-30 from G.I.Joe and YF-19 from Macross. They could repaint Terradive or Space Case from the movie verse, with a new head mold. Though I would prefer a brand new mold with a more G1-esque robot form. And I want the trigger switch gun action on the updated figure! That never gets old.
 
 

8. Freeway
Allegiance: Autobot
Sub-Group: Throttlebot
Function: Saboteur
Modes: robot, sports car
 
 

I had to include at least one Throttlebot on here. I have all 6 Throttlebots. I know there was at least one update to Goldbug. There could be more. But what about the other Throttlebots? Anyway, Freeway is my favorite out of the six, so I elect him to get an update. I know ToyWorld produced updates to all 6 Throttlebots, including Freeway (which they called Highway). I have their update to Searchlight and Chase (Aurora and Trace, respectively). Speaking of Chase, I think Roadburn may be the modern update to Chase. Still, there is no update to Freeway. If Hasbro wants to be lazy, just take Roadburn and repaint him blue to be Freeway. Personally I rather see a real update with a new mold. C’mon Hasbro get on it.
 
 

7. Venom
Allegiance: Decepticon
Sub-Group: Insecticon
Function: Psychological Warfare
Modes: robot, cicada
 
 

Finally, a Decepticon on here! When I was compiling this list, I immediately saw that they were mostly Autobots. So I very consciously tried to include more Decepticons. But if playing with the rules that I laid out above, there are almost no Decepticons to include. When you exclude Pretenders and Action Masters, it feels like all G1 Decepticons got an update. I did’t specifically exclude Micromasters in my rules, but deep down I feel they are just not cool enough. Deluxe Insecticons never got any love in G1 in the cartoons. The toys came as early as Season 2, so I’m including one here. Out of the 4, Chop Shop is the only one to have had an update (a lame repaint of Generations Skarpnel). So I could have picked any of the other 3. I chose Venom to be on this list for 3 reasons: 1) I like his wacky head mold, 2) he’s technically the Insecticon leader, though realistically that’s Shrapnel, and 3) he shares the same function of Psychological Warfare as Bombshell, my favorite Insecticon. In G1 I never had any of the Deluxe Insecticons, and I don’t know anyone that did. Thus I have no idea if the toys were any good. But if HasTak chose to update them now, I bet they could do something pretty nice.
 
 

6. Slugfest
Allegiance: Decepticon
Sub-Group: Cassette
Function: Messenger
Modes: stegosaurus, cassette
 
 

Another Decepticon on here! Slugfest is one of the few that I could find without any kind of update. I have the G1 toy, along with Overkill. You get these 2 in one pack. That’s how G1 sold the cassettes. Again, I’m partial to toys I had, and I still got these 2 in pretty good shape. They repainted other toys to be Overkill a bunch of times, probably anytime Hasbro felt like making a repaint from another T-Rex for a quick score. Slugfest never got any love. The character does not exist past G1. That’s a crime. Slugfest is just as cool as Overkill, for G1 standards. If you wanna go the repaint route, take Power of the Primes Snarl and give that Slugfest colors (that would look kinda cool, actually). Though I like a new mold, that transforms from stegosaurus to cassette. While you’re at it, do Overkill too. A real update from T-Rex to cassette. Hasbro this is your chance to impress me.
 
 

5. Sizzle
Allegiance: Autobot
Sub-Group: Sparkabot
Function: Interceptor
Modes: robot, funny car
 
 

A Sparkabot or Firecon is required on this list. These 2 Sub-Groups feature another popular toy gimmick at the time. All figures have a friction-motor that produces cold sparks. For the 3 Sparkabots, the cold sparks fire out the rear exhaust in vehicle alt mode. And for the 3 Firecons, sparks come out of their mouths in the monster alt mode. Sizzle is my favorite out of this 6 (and again, he’s the only one I had out of this bunch). For most G1 Fans, Sizzle is the one that everyone thinks of when this group is mentioned. In his tech spec bio, he’s described as a daredevil of an Autobot, akin to Hot Rod, Fastlane, or Air Raid. He transforms into a cool funny car. I think Hasbro needs to update Sizzle for that reason alone; I can’t think of any other funny car Transformers. His color scheme is also quite unique, going from an ash brown in car mode to tangerine red in robot mode. I very much would like to see cold sparks in a modern day figure, though I imagine Hasbro would never do it.
 
 

4. Slapdash
Allegiance: Autobot
Sub-Group: Powermaster
Function: Interceptor
Modes: robot, F1 race car
 
 

I love Powermasters. I first mentioned that here, and probably elsewhere on this blog too. From a toy perspective, having a Mini-con that transforms into the engine to unlock the transformation is kinda cool. But from a story perspective, it’s kinda lame. Now that I think about it, all Master technology makes no sense. If I was a TF, no way I share my head, weapons, or transformation ability with someone else. Nevertheless, the Powermaster toys were all really good for G1 standards. My favorite Powermaster is Getaway, who was updated as Breakaway. So I’m going to include the other 2 Autobot Powermasters not updated. The first one is Slapdash. I really don’t know much about the character, and I only vaguely remember the toy. He transforms into a F1 race car. Hasbro could just be lazy here and repaint WFC Siege Mirage. But don’t be lazy, be cool. Make a new mold.
 
 

3. Joyride
Allegiance: Autobot
Sub-Group: Powermaster
Function: Warrior
Modes: robot, dune buggy
 
 

Joyride is the other Autobot Powermaster that was released with Getaway and Slapdash. I know very little of Joyride as well, other than that his toy was pretty cool. He transforms into a dune buggy. Off the top of my head, I can only think of 2 other Earth mode dune buggies in the entire TF Universe: G1 Beachcomber and G2 Jetstorm. I like the color scheme on Joyride as well. He kinda has the same color palette as Skullcruncher (or Skullsmasher in recent updates). This is a very unique color scheme that belongs only to these 2 TFs. Maybe this needs to be explored. Or not.
 
 

2. Sureshot
Allegiance: Autobot
Sub-Group: Targetmaster
Function: Sharpshooter
Modes: robot, Cybertronian buggy
 
 

I love Targetmasters. So in preparation for this post, I looked through every Targetmaster ever made in G1. As far as I can tell, all the Decepticon Targetmasters have had an update for some kind. As for the Autobots, there are several that could use some love. One of them is Sureshot. I don’t know much about the character. He appeared in “Rebirth”, but his role was next to non-existent, so you would only find him if you really squint your optics and look. I never had the G1 toy, and I don’t know anyone that did. But it looks pretty cool, based on pictures. HasTak can really go to town and make a terrific update of this character if they chose to. If they opt to be cheap, they could make one mold and use it for both Joyride and Sureshot. They are both buggies in alt mode. Make the head mold different. Give Sureshot a Battlemaster and Joyride some kind of engine accessory. This is almost too easy to not do. I’m almost confident enough to bet that this will happen.
 
 

1. Pointblank
Allegiance: Autobot
Sub-Group: Targetmaster
Function: Enforcer
Modes: robot, Cybertronian car
 
 

I can’t believe Pointblank has not been officially updated yet. Back in G1 Season 4 when Hasbro introduced all the “Master” gimmicks, Pointblank is widely regarded as one of the best figures produced for that period. Many G1 fans jumped on getting Pointblank very quickly. His Cybertronian car alt mode looks great, and the robot mode looks well proportioned too. The color combination of red and baby blue sounds hokey on paper, but on the figure it doesn’t look too shabby. I am told too that Pointblank has a bigger role in the Japanese TF Continuity after Season 4. I have the MakeToys update of Pointblank, called Contactshot. Overall, Contactshot is not a bad 3P product, but there could be improvements. He’s a big figure in robot mode, which presents scale issues, even for MP. And the transformation is more complicated than it needs to be for a character like Pointblank. It’s high time HasTak stepped up to the plate and gave us an official update. Pointblank should probably be deluxe size to scale with other CHUG figs. Modern HasTak figures of this size are all very playable, which is exactly what I’m looking for in a Pointblank update.
 
 

So what do you think of my top 10? I know if another G1 fan had to make a top 10 based on the rules I laid out above, it would be very different. Feel free to comment below.

Transform and Roll Out.

 

Welcome to this special exciting installment of Before Carly, 4th of July Edition! As usual, I will start with what I think was the official description given by Seibertron:

“Spike is quite the ladies man. He eventually married Carly, but she was not the only one to have fun in the backseat of Bumblebee.”

The fictitious name of each girl is made to sound like various characters in the TF universe, and each part of every name is based on real names I’ve seen. See how many TFs you can identify. “Freedom is the right of all sentient beings,” and the babes below celebrate freedom on the 4th of July the best way they know how.

Hover the mouse over each girl’s name to see the name of the TF. Let freedom ring! Join Spike as he celebrates Independence Day with all the patriotic babes below.

Enjoy the pics.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

You know you want more Before Carly…
Before Carly
Before Carly 2
Before Carly 3
Before Carly 4
Before Carly 5
Before Carly 6

Happy Independence Day! God Bless America!!! Transform and Roll Out!

 

I have a lot of Transformers. I do play with them, and I try to be as careful as I can be when transforming them. But when you have as many as I do, you’re bound to break some. Occasionally the figures come broken (yes this has happened). Sometimes an inherent flaw in manufacturing or design lends the figure to breaking after only a few play.

Below are 10 of the figures from my collection where something has occurred to render them less than perfect. My heart breaks every time one of my Transformers breaks. Read on and see if you have mishandled any of these 10.
 

Brawl (Leader Class)
Series: Movie (2007)
Allegiance: Decepticon
Function: Ground Assault
Mode in Package: Robot
Known Redecos: Movie Deep Desert Brawl
Status: Returned to store; got replacement

The Figure:
Movie Leader Class Brawl is one of only few Leader Class figures I have from the entire Movie-verse. I highly recommend him. The robot mode is decent, but the tank mode is where this figure truly shines. He also has working lights and sounds, if that’s your thing.

The Incident:
First time I purchased this figure was from Toys R Us, and he was already broken out of the box. I documented this already, back in this post. There was a peg that came broken. It’s been more than 10 years now, so I don’t remember exactly which peg. But I think it was on the turret.

The Aftermath: I quickly returned Brawl to Toys R Us. I would have simply asked for a exchange, if they only had more of the figure. Since they didn’t, I asked for a refund and then bought it again on Amazon. And for cheaper too – looking up my old Amazon records, I re-purchased him for only $31.99! Can’t imagine getting a Leader Class figure for that price nowadays.
 

Samurai Prowl (Deluxe Class)
Series: Animated
Allegiance: Autobot
Function: Autobot Spy
Mode in Package: Motorcycle with Sidecar
Known Redecos: none
Status: Returned to store; no replacement

The Figure:
Samurai Prowl is one of the hardest figures to find from the Animated line. I was super thrilled when I found one on pure happenstance. He appeared on a TRU shelf when the TFA line of toys was officially over. I documented that purchase here and a review here.

The Incident:
I outlined how I damaged the toy in the review. Specifically, the connection between the motorcycle and the side car is broken. The whole thing happened in such a way that I didn’t even notice it when the breakage occurred. I have must broken it on the first transform from alt mode to robot mode, because I saw the breakage on the reverse transformation. I’m forced to think that connection must have been super brittle. However I haven’t seen any other documented cases of this, so it’s possible I was being too rough. Though that’s not like me at all – when it comes to my TFs I’m usually careful to a fault.

The Aftermath:
I wasn’t happy about the breakage at the time, and I don’t feel any better about it now. I returned the figure to TRU, because perhaps the TF OCD in me can’t stand to have broken figures in my collection. But like I said, this figure is hard to find. I only saw him one other time. It was at the dealer’s room at a BotCon. The dealer wanted $40 for it, and no way was I gonna pay that. Sad to say, I never saw the figure in store again. Checking on Amazon just now, the lowest price is around $100. In retrospect, maybe I should have just hung on to my broken Samurai Prowl, or spent the $40 at BotCon for another one.
 

Bumblebee (Deluxe Class)
Series: Animated
Allegiance: Autobot
Function: Autobot Speedster
Mode in Package: Car
Known Redecos: Elite Guard Bumblebee, Jetpack Bumblebee
Status: Damaged; got replacement

The Figure:
From one TFA figure we go to another. I got TFA Deluxe Bumblebee in a pack of 15 figures I bought used on Cragislist, something that I documented here. TFA figures as a whole don’t have the best construction. They often feel like cheap plastic cobbled together into a toy by ill-fitting ball joints. Bumblebee is a prime example of this. The alt mode cockpit pieces that form the back of the legs are connected by ball joints. One of them is too loose, and keeps coming off.

The Incident:
I tried to fix said loose joint by applying some nail polish to the socket. Unfortunately, I applied too much and now the ball won’t go in at all. So I guess you could say I broke this by trying to fix it.

The Aftermath:
I tried to buy another Bumblebee in store, but by then the Animated line was officially over. Online retailers were all charging a markup. Bumblebee is a mediocre figure at best, so I’m not paying markup for such a figure. Fortunately for me, I was able to get a Japanese version of this figure at a pretty good price, way less than whatever the MSRP was. That purchase was outlined here. The Japanese version is better anyway, with shiny chrome paint and slightly better construction. This is the figure that represents my Bumblebee in my TFA line. As for the “broken” Bumblebee, I keep him around for spare parts. He has come in handy, which brings me to my next entry…
 

Megatron (Voyager Class)
Series: Transformers United
Allegiance: Decepticon
Function: Decepticon Leader
Mode in Package: Robot
Known Redecos: Classics Megatron, Henkei Megatron
Status: Repaired

The Figure:
I am still not sure what exactly is Transformers United. It was a Japanese only line. As far as I can tell, Takara took a bunch of Henkei figures, repainted them, and released this United line. There was no US equivalent. Anyways, Classics Megatron was one of the first 6 figures produced in the Classics line. The line is significant in that it started an update of classic G1 characters in modern forms while still capturing the G1 spirit. As a figure, the design of Classics Megatron is questionable. He does transform into a gun, which all G1-ers love. But Classics Megatron fits the very definition of shell-former (think G1 Scourge). Also, his alt mode kinda looks like a futuristic Cybertron pistol at best, and a toy water gun at worst. The Classics colors also don’t help matters, and even I have to agree that the US version of the figure used some kid friendly colors that made Megatron look like a Nerf toy gun. And so I wanted a more G1 accurate version of this figure. I was at BotCon 2011, and saw a dealer selling the United version of this figure at a reasonable price. So I bought it.

The Incident:
I’m not in the habit of opening my toys at the convention. After I got home, I find that something is wrong with the transformation. I can’t get the waist to properly align correctly for alt mode. Upon closer inspection, I see that a part in the waist is installed backwards! The whole thing is assembled with a screw, so all you really had to do is unscrew the assembly, re-position the part, and re-screw. However, it took me sometime to figure all this out. And by the time I did, I totally mangled the head of the screw. Fortunately I got the screw out, but there was no way it could be used again.

The Aftermath:
In the last entry I mentioned I use TFA Bumblebee for spare parts, and he has a screw that kinda fits into United Megatron. I now use that screw to secure this part of Megatron’s waist. The part in question is only visible during transformation. The fit with Bumblebee’s screw is not perfect. Rotation of the part using this screw is quite loose. However, the loose rotation is only apparent during transformation. And the waist as a whole has other parts that lock it into place in both alt and robot modes. So I’m ok with this fix. I have made peace with the fact that my United Megatron is not perfect, but functional (que “I still function” from the G1 Movie).
 

Darksteel (Deluxe Class)
Series: Dark of the Moon
Allegiance: Decepticon
Function: ???
Mode in Package: Sports Car
Known Redecos: DotM Sideswipe
Status: Damaged; got replacement

The Figure:
Dark of the Moon Darksteel is not a character in the movie. I’m not sure if he has an appearance anywhere. Darksteel is another quick cash grab off an existing mold, in this case Sideswipe from the same movie. In all honesty, this mold is pretty cool. The redeco colors chosen for Darksteel is smashingly striking, and he does have a unique head mold that differentiate him from Sideswipe. I bought one when the figure was first released. I transformed him from alt mode to robot mode no problem.

The Incident:
Some months later I decided to transform him back to alt mode. It was late a night and I guess I was a bit too careless. Long story short, I bent one of the feet pieces the wrong way and broke it. I have transformed Sideswipe many times so I thought I knew the process, but I will admit that I don’t remember how TFs transform as well as I used to.

The Aftermath:
Some months after the first breakage, I went to shop at Kohls because they mailed me a $10 certificate, good for anything in the store. Most people don’t know this, but Kohls also has a toy section. Occasionally they will have Transformers. Anyways, on this particular trip, I find that they had Darksteel. They were already having a 10% off sale. And with the $10 certificate, the final price of Darksteel came to only $3.90. I documented that purchase here. To this day, I still have this 2nd copy of Darksteel mint in the package. I’ll probably keep this unopened. He’s not worth so much now, but maybe one day.
 

Optimus Prime (Voyager Class)
Series: Transformers Prime Beast Hunters
Allegiance: Autobot
Function: Autobot Leader
Mode in Package: Robot
Known Redecos: Beast Hunters Optimus Prime (with extra green armor)
Status: Attempting repairs; got replacements

The Figure:
You didn’t think I was gonna get through this list without having an Optimus Prime figure on here, did you? Hasbro makes so many Optimus figures that it would be weird not to break one if you collected as many TFs as I did. I really like Beast Hunters Optimus. The toy is a good size to play with. He’s got a fun and intuitive transformation, and the figure looks good in both modes. I’m not crazy about the head mold, and hardcore TFP fans love to point out that his sword in the show is blue, not green. Still, at less than $20, this is a terrific OP figure.

The Incident:
I have only ever broken one Optimus Prime figure, and it’s this one. It could be worse, like if I broke the MP-10. But like I said, BH Optimus is one of the better figures of the famous Autobot Leader, so I’m still a bit bothered by it. Also, this figure represents something significant in my personal life, as I have documented here. So it kinda pains me to see it less than perfect. What happened is I broke the sword while Optimus is holding it, so now the handle of the sword is stuck in Prime’s right fist. I felt the sword being stuck in the fist, yet I still tried to force it out. Not a good move. Though I’m sure it was a bad job with the tolerance that led to this. My buddy Gemini had the same problem. Only he was more patient and submerged the fist and sword in really hot water and pulled it out.

The Aftermath:
To compensate for this breakage, I went out and purchased more BH Optimus figures, documented in the same post. I got both the US and Japanese versions of this, so now I have two unopened BH Optimus Prime figures sitting in a closet. I’m glad I did, because they are now worth quite a bit. I still want to attempt a fix on my original figure though. I recently bought the 3rd party Blue Skybreaker Sword by Dr Wu that is way better than the sword that came with BH Optimus. Now I just need to get the broken sword handle out of Optimus’ right fist. If I can do that, I will consider this figure back in perfect condition. Maybe I’ll try Gemini’s hot water trick.
 

Bumblebee (Deluxe Class, part of TRU Exclusive 2-pack)
Series: Age of Extinction
Allegiance: Autobot
Function: ???
Mode in Package: Robot
Known Redecos: AoE Bumblebee, standard edition
Status: Damaged; no replacement

The Figure:
How many Deluxe Bumblebees did they make from the Movie-verse? Too many to count, that’s for sure. I got one Deluxe Bumblebee in modern Camaro form from each of the 5 movies. The one featured here is from the 4th movie: Age of Extinction. After a while, all these Bumblebees just kinda blend together. The later Bees became one giant yellow blur. I don’t remember anything special about this one, other than the two circular disc type weapons that he has. For AoE, I got the special TRU 2-pack edition. The package comes with the standard AoE Deluxe Bumblebee that’s painted a bit more orange, and a repaint of Generations Legend Bumblebee from the Thrilling 30 line. One of these days I should put together all my Deluxe Movie Bumblebees for a group photo.

The Incident:
One night when I was transforming AoE Bumblebee from robot to car, I broke off the this right shoulder piece. This piece becomes the front right area of the hood in alt mode. I don’t even know what happened exactly. The part just broke on me. I dunno, I might have forced something, or maybe the part was just weak. Movie toys usually don’t have the best construction to begin with.

The Aftermath:
I thought about buying another standard Deluxe AoE Bumblebee to replace this broken one. But my feelings about this figure is mediocre at best. I didn’t wanna pay MSRP, though I was never able to find another one at less than that. So chances are this figure will just remain broken, not getting replaced or repaired.
 

Bumblebee (Deluxe Class, part of Bumblebee vs Barricade First Encounter 2-pack)
Series: Movie (2007)
Allegiance: Autobot
Function: ???
Mode in Package: Robot
Known Redecos: Movie (2007) Bumblebee standard edition, Target Exclusive Evolution of Bumblebee 2-pack
Status: Damaged; no replacement

The Figure:
How many Bumblebees are we gonna have on this list? And why do I keep breaking them? This is the last one, I promise. This is the very first Deluxe Bumblebee released in the Movie-verse. This figure transforms into a classic Camaro, the car that Sam first owns for the first half of the original Movie (and still the best). All the initial Movie toys had this crazy gimmick called “Advanced Automorph Technology”, sometimes just Automorph for short. Basically, several parts of the figure will auto transform upon moving a single piece. This is usually done through spring-loaded action built into the figure. In the case of this classic Caramo Bumblebee figure, the hood will automatically fold down to form the chest upon doing something else (of which I don’t recall anymore). It sounds cool, but it really isn’t.

The Incident:
The problem with these kinds of physical gimmicks is that they’re prone to breakage, and that’s exactly what happened. Years after I owned this figure, I dug him out of a box in the closet. I usually keep my figures in alt mode. When I found him, I saw that the car’s front hood is folded down. I tried to fold it back up, but it won’t click into position anymore. This figure broke while it was in storage. Some plastic pieces broke off after years of holding Automorph spring pressure. I probably should have stored this guy in robot mode. Lesson learned.

The Aftermath:
I actually had another version of this figure as part of the Target Exclusive Evolution of Bumblebee 2-pack. I kept it new but then sold it later, before I found out about the breakage. I do kind of want another one of this Bumblebee, not because it’s a great figure, but for it’s significance as part of a toyline that crossed from animation into live action media. Not a priority though.
 

M-F-B
Series: N/A
Allegiance: Autobot
Function: N/A
Mode in Package: N/A
Known Redecos: None
Status: Damaged; no replacement

The Figure:
This isn’t technically a figure. This is a gun accessory called M-F-B by 3rd party MakeToys. Due to licensing reasons, they can’t call it what it is, which is My First Blaster. In the IDW line of TF comics, this is a weapon for smaller sized Autobots. Swerve is often seen holding the weapon. MakeToys made this accessory to go with their Swerve figure (called Trash-Talk).

The Incident:
I got this accessory in the hopes that it would fit the Generations Thrilling 30 version of Swerve. Turns out, it doesn’t. The handle for M-F-B is 3mm, while Swerve’s hands are for 5mm weapons. Also, I didn’t know this came as a model kit (or maybe I did, but then forgot). I’m terrible at building models. During assembly, I broke off one of the light green bulbs that go on top of the M-F-B. Total bummer.

The Aftermath:
The breakage is beyond repair. And since this actually doesn’t even fit Generations Swerve, and I don’t have Trash-Talk, there’s no point for me to hunt down another one. This M-F-B will stay broken.
 

Soar (Blue)
Series: N/A
Allegiance: Autobot
Function: Bombadier
Mode in Package: Robot
Known Redecos: Soar (Red), Soar (Red comic), Soar (Blue comic)
Status: Repaired

The Figure:
Soar by Fans Toys is an awesome homage to G1 Swoop. I have written about this figure already, so read all the details here. If you are collecting Masterpiece style figures and you need to round out your Dinobot collection, you need this figure.

The Incident:
Nothing was technically broken on my Soar. However, when I got the figure, it was missing the large vertical piece of the display stand that Soar sits on in dino mode. I couldn’t believe it! This is the largest piece in the package next to Soar itself. I love Fans Toys, but where was the QC on this?!

The Aftermath:
Capturedprey.com was gracious enough to hunt down a replacement piece of the stand for me. It took several months, but better late than never. I now have a fully completed Soar figure in perfect condition with all accessories intact. Thank you Capturedprey!
 

I do have more figures that are broken/damaged/missing parts, but these 10 will do for now. I’ll make another post when I have another 10. Hopefully that won’t occur. Though with the amount of Transformers I have, it’s only a matter of time.

What figures have you broken? Or come damaged or missing parts? Feel free to comment below.

Transform and Roll Out.
 

Welcome to another edition of Before Carly! It has been about two and a half years since the last installment, so here we go again with this long overdue episode of Before Carly 6! As usual, I will start with what I think was the official description given by Seibertron:

“Spike is quite the ladies man. He eventually married Carly, but she was not the only one to have fun in the backseat of Bumblebee.”

The fictitious name of each girl is made to sound like various characters in the TF universe, and each part of every name is based on real names I’ve seen. See how many TFs you can identify. Spike sure is lucky. How can he keep his mind on saving the Earth from routine Decepticon attacks while he has all these babes to keep him busy? We may never know the truth. What Spike did off camera will be a mystery for the ages.

Hover the mouse over each girl’s name to see the name of the TF. Make Spike proud! Impress all these babes with how much Transformers you know. Or not.

Enjoy the pics!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

If you can’t get enough of Before Carly, here are links to the previous installments:
Before Carly
Before Carly 2
Before Carly 3
Before Carly 4
Before Carly 5

Everyone loves Before Carly! Transform and Roll Out!

 

Starscream is perhaps the most eloquent Transformer to ever grace the world of Cybertron. His combat abilities are near the top of the Decepticon ranks, but it’s his oratory skills that truly cement his place among the upper Deception echelon. Starscream could easily manipulate his way to leadership if Megatron wasn’t around.

The cunning Deception air commander has a bunch of famous quotes that you can use in your everyday work life, especially if you want to play the game of office politics. I have compiled 10 such lines and they appear below in no particular order. Use them to your advantage.
 

“It’s time for action, not words! I am the leader of the future!”
Source: Transformers (1984), More Than Meets the Eye Part 3
Context: Starscream calls for a change in Decepticon leadership. But of course Megatron would have none of it.
When to use: Management loves to promote employees who appear to be proactive. Remember, they keyword here is appear. When the opportunity presents itself, show your enthusiasm and utter this line, loud and clear. Let your superiors know that you can take charge, and that everything will get done when you’re on top of it. Management loves that, because now they think they don’t have to do a thing, like they lazy asses that they are.
 

“Faster, you malingering peasants!”
Source: Transformers (1984), A Decepticon Raider in King Arthur’s Court
Context: Starscream orders his human slaves to work faster on a electric dynamo.
When to use: Your slacker subordinates are working too slowly and making you look bad for being in charge. Now is the time for this quote. Crack that whip hard to get these good-for-nothings back to productivity.
 

“Do I have a second on that?”
Source: Transformers the Movie (1986)
Context: Starscream, being the opportunistic weasel that he is, saw a chance to overthrow a seriously injured Megatron by suggesting all near-death Decepticons be jettisoned into space so the healthy Decepticons can save themselves. He then proceeds to lobby for agreement, knowing full well he would get the support he needs.
When to use: Office politics is all about timing and alliances. When the opportunity is right, suggest something that will advance your position, whatever the situation. Then use this quote to get your office allies to back up said suggestion and carry the motion forward. Or you can just use the line to help yourself to a second helping of paid office lunches.
 

“You scratch my back, I scratch yours.”
Source: Transformers Prime (2011), Sick Mind
Context: Starscream approves of a plan where he and Knockout will mutually benefit. Megatron is stuck in stasis, and Starscream wants nothing more than to permanently deactivate him. Knockout, using his position as chief surgeon, will make a false recommendation that Megatron cannot be saved. When Starscream becomes leader, he agrees to promote Knockout as his second-in-command.
When to use: Having allies in the office is of extreme importance, as suggested in the last quote. The best way to build allies is to do something mutually beneficial. When the opportunity arises, take an action that will help your ally, or elicit help now for a returned favor in the future. Then use this line to seal the deal, ensuring that this action does not go overlooked.
 

“You would be supreme!”
Source: Transformers (1984), Auto Berserk
Context: A circuit-crossed Red Alert becomes super paranoid and thinks the Autobots are out to get him. Starscream saw this as an opportunity to advance is own personal gain. He would temporarily ally with Red Alert, and to do that Starscream told Red Alert everything he wanted to hear.
When to use: Kissing a little ass never hurts anyone. There are many perks to being well liked in the office, and the key to popularity is to let everyone else presume you think they’re wonderful, even if in fact you don’t. Flattery would get you everywhere. Unless of course someone is sucking up to you, in which case you should…
 

“Ah, flattery will get you flattened, vermin…”
Source: Beast Wars (1997), Possession
Context: Starscream’s ghost has possessed Waspinator. Starscream/Waspinator cleverly retorts an insult made by Rattrap.
When to use: Office workers that do no work but excel at kissing ass needs to be put in their place. When slacking brown nosers pay you any kind of bogus compliment, offer up this quote and then proceed to double down on their workload.
 

“You’re supposed to know everything. What are those?!”
Source: Transformers (1984), S.O.S. Dinobots
Context: Dinobots make their debut for the first time and surprises the Decepticons. Starscream mockingly asks Megatron for the identity of their new enemy.
When to use: Sometimes, to make yourself look good, you have to make others look bad. This line could be directed at anyone, including your boss, another authority figure, or simply a co-worker you hate. When your target is caught in a moment of weakness in front of a group, deliver this quote to sting that person good. For example, let’s say your boss is giving a presentation, and someone asked a question that s/he cannot answer. Quickly spew out this line to shine light on their stupidity and inflict maximum damage.
 

“I hear this is where all the idiots hangout.”
Source: Transformers Fall of Cybertron (2012), Chapter 11 Starscream’s Betrayal
Context: A group of Decepticon drone soldiers are talking smack about Starscream behind his back. Of course Starscream is hiding and heard everything. He mocks them before he effortlessly destroys them all.
When to use: This is the perfect line to use when you have caught a bunch of lazy co-workers gathered somewhere, slacking off on company time. Alternatively, offer up this quote next time you enter a board meeting. Make it clear to the useless board members what you really think of them, before you take over the company and fire all their sorry asses.
 

“Don’t start with me, woman!”
Source: Transformers Animated (2008), A Bridge Too Close Part 1
Context: Starscream is addressing Seekers cloned from himself. Slipstream, the only female clone, continuously barrages the original host with sarcastic and witty comments. Starscream has had enough and he makes his dissatisfaction perfectly clear.
When to use: When a female coworker causes you office displeasure by belittling you, such as questioning your authority or second guessing your decisions, it is time to let this quote fly. If you are of the fairer sex, then using this shouldn’t cause any issues, other than hurt feelings. The rest of you needs to tread carefully, however. Make sure no one else is within earshot, and that you’re not recorded. You could face possible HR disciplinary action at best, and a sexual harassment suit at worst.
 

“I’m stupid! I’m stupid!”
Source: Transformers (1984), Triple Takeover
Context: Megatron was about to destroy Starscream for his treachery. A humbled Starscream begs for mercy while admitting stupidity.
When to use: If/When you are about to be fired for using any of these quotes in the manner suggested (especially that last one), quickly whip out this line to feign inferiority to your superiors. A little groveling never hurts anyone. Get on your hands and knees and bow down repeatedly for full effect.
 

Here are usable workplace quotes by other famous Transformers:

• Optimus Prime
• Megatron

Lord Starscream commands you to… Transform and Roll Out!

Back in 1984, the creators of The Transformers were tasked with giving identities to the disjointed robot toy figures of Japanese origin. They created Autobots and Decepticons, gave them interesting names and personalities, and assigned scores to various attributes that would make up the unique character behind the toy. All of this was captured in a Tech Spec bio on the back of the package box or card. One of the most clever things that would appear in a Tech Spec is the character’s motto. One little clever line of the motto, and you get a world of insight into the character’s persona. Pure genius.

However as the years went on, creators of Transformer characters had to write more and more mottos as Hasbro produced more and more toys. It was inevitable that some of the more forgettable characters in later years (and even some famous ones) would share mottos that are almost identical with another character.

They say being quoted is the ultimate honor. Perhaps some characters below are simply paying homage to someone else. Or Hasbro is just too lazy to fact check if a motto is already used, or they think no one would notice. Whatever the case, below I present 10 sets of similar mottos shared by more than one character. The sets are presented from highly similar to virtually identical.

Nightbeat “Truth is revealed in the smallest detail.”

Sparkstalker “The smallest details reveal the largest secrets.”

Here we have two characters that are unknown to all but the most hardcore G1-ers like myself. Nightbeat is a detective Headmaster that appeared in G1 Season 5. Sparkstalker is a Firecon that appeared in the same season. Neither character made a cartoon appearance. This motto makes sense for Nightbeat, as attention to detail is of utmost importance for successful detectives. But as for the Firecon, this is a strange motto to have. Firecons are a sub-group of transforming Decepticon monsters that like to set everything ablaze. So a detail-oriented pyromaniac almost seems like a oxymoron. I’m sure his tech spec bio explained this strange juxtaposition, but I doubt any of you reading this care much about Sparkstalker, so I’m not even looking into it. You would think Hasbro would not come up with two mottos that are so similar in the same season. Maybe they only paid for one tech spec writer and he cut corners here.

Afterburner “Following leaders leads nowhere.”

Fangry “Leaders are for fools who need to follow.”

I have mentioned many times that Technobots are my favorite Autobot combiner group. And Afterburner is my favorite Technobot. The first time I saw him on TV was in the G1 Season 3 episode “Money Is Everything” (I must have missed “Grimlock’s New Brain” the first time it aired). In the episode, I loved Afterburner’s persona, rebelling against his team and doing whatever he wants. I also loved his cool futuristic motorcycle alt mode. His motto makes perfect sense, and captures his essence well.

Before millenials made up hangry (hunger + angry, or so hungry you’re angry), there was Fangry (fangs + angry). I gotta give Hasbro props for coming up with these clever names. I don’t know much about Fangry, other than he’s a Decepticon Headmaster that came out in Season 5. Apparently he transforms into a winged wolf, and he’s just as much a rebel (if not more so) as Afterburner. Fangry’s personally is basically that of your average Decepticon; all about war and destruction and little else.

Crosshairs “Don’t shoot until you see the wires in their eyes.”

Dogfight “Don’t fire ’til you see the lights of their eyes.”

Crosshairs is a Targetmaster that appeared in G1 Season 4. I had the toy, and even today he’s in pretty good shape. I don’t remember if I bought him, or if he was a birthday gift. Dogfight is a Triggerbot that appeared in Season 5. I didn’t have any Triggerbots or Triggercons, their gimmick being that the figures have guns that flip out at the touch of a switch. The above mottos are so similar I think Hasbro plagiarized themselves. Crosshairs says shoot, while Dogfight says fire. Crosshairs searches for wires, while Dogfight looks for lights. Tomato, tomahto.

Blades “War’s a dirty game – and I’m a dirty player!”

Roadbuster “War is a dirty business … and I’m as dirty as they come.”

Blades appeared late in Season 2 in the G1 cartoons. But his toy didn’t hit the shelves until Season 3. Roadbuster‘s toy appeared in Season 2, but he never made a cartoon appearance. So it’s a bit unclear to me which of these characters came first. These two Autobot soldiers are obviously cut from the same cloth. They both express an intention of doing whatever needs doing to win the war, including activities that may be seen as unsavory. But the teams they’re on appears to be polar opposites. Blades is a Protectobot, a combiner sub-group united by their passion of protecting all life. Roadbuster is a Wrecker, an Autobot black-ops unit that handles morally disreputable missions too dangerous for the Autobots proper. It boggles my mind why they’re mottos would be so similar. Maybe Hasbro simply ran out of material here. If I was a TF story writer, I would retcon it so that Blades may have been a former Wrecker. Then he became disillusioned with their morally questionable activities and joined up with the Protectobots. That would explain his motto. Damn, Hasbro should pay me to write this stuff.

Ramjet “If it flies, crash it!”

Growl “If it moves, crush it!”

Either the same guy wrote these mottos, or someone copied an existing motto from 5 years earlier in a desperate attempt to come up with a new motto. Ramjet needs no introduction. He’s the most famous character in this post so far. [Sidebar: A quick search for Ramjet on this blog yielded no results directly related to Ramjet. That’s shameful! So he’s getting his 15 minutes of fame here.] Growl is a character that even I had to look up. He technically belongs with G1, but his appearance came so late it’s no longer relevant. But in case you’re curious, Growl is a Micromaster that was part of the Military Patrol. These two mottos are so similar it’s just embarrassing. The sentence structure is exactly the same. The action of crash vs crush differs only by one letter. And both mottos end on an emphasis with exclamation marks. If G1 didn’t already end 25 years ago, I ask that these tech spec writers be fired.

Bruticus “The road to conquest is paved with Autobot wrecks.”

Blackjack “The road to victory is paved with Autobot wrecks!”

Here we have two characters that just love to wreck havoc to Autobots. And the way they express that excitement is near identical. One cares more about conquest, while the other expresses more enthusiasm for victory (with a exclamation mark ! ). As one of the most powerful combiners among the Decepticon ranks, this motto makes sense for Bruticus. But for Blackjack? I dunno. He’s another Micromaster. I doubt he can cause any kind of damage that would hurt the Autobots. Maybe he’s like Rumble; small, talks tough, and can back it up sometimes. Or maybe Hasbro can’t come up with anything interesting after all the bios they’ve written by the time Blackjack rolled around that they resorted to rehashing old bios and mottos.

Cloudburst “You can’t tell a bot by his cover!”

Bristleback “You can’t tell a Decepticon by its cover.”

I hate Pretenders. I have made that perfectly clear. It’s such a stupid gimmick that even Hasbro has not tried to revive any likeness thereof after G1. None of the modern third parties, who have produced some awesome stuff in recent years, would go close to Pretenders. Its stupidity is further validated by the fact that Michael Bay jumped all over it in Revenge of the Fallen. And so here we have a pair of lame mottos uttered by two lame Pretenders. I guess this is a play on words, a variation of the famous “you can’t tell a book by its cover.” It’s really not that clever, but what makes it more moronic is that Hasbro saw fit to use this twice! First time by Cloudburst, one of the first Pretender Autobots (and I’m ashamed to admit I have the G1 toy) from Season 5. Then the following Season by Bristleback, a Decepticon Pretender Monster. In this case it really doesn’t matter who came first. It’s the exact same motto given the faction switch. I hate Pretenders so I’m not even gonna research why these two characters love to use their shells to hide whatever it is they’re hiding. Just know this: these shells cannot hide how dumb these toys are. Almost as dumb as this pair of mottos.

Blitzwing “Destroy first, think later.”	Siren “Act first, ask questions later.”
Predaking “Destroy first, ask questions later.”

Here I present three mottos that form a collection. First we have Blitzwing, often considered the most famous triple changer in Transformer history. Then we have Siren, an Autobot Headmaster that came along when G1 is no longer relevant. Their mottos don’t look that bad when compared side by side. Sure the sentence structure is near identical, and the notion of acting first and cleaning up later may be similar, but the expressed actions are different enough that I’m tempted to give Hasbro a pass here. That is until I saw the motto for Predaking. The combined form of the Predacons is perhaps to most powerful combiner in Transformers lore. Predaking is a merging of 5 components, and his motto is merging of 2 other mottos! That’s right folks. Take the first part of Blitzwing’s motto, combine that with the latter part of Siren’s motto, and you get Predaking’s motto. Booya! Predaking is a combiner in more ways than one. If Blitzwing and Siren had a baby, it be Predaking.

Wildrider “Either you’re out of my way or you’re out of luck.”

Fastlane “Either you’re out of my way or out of luck.”

They say imitation is the ultimate form of flattery. But dropping one word out of a motto and claiming it as new is just plain lazy. Here we have a pair of characters that love to rev it up on the streets. Wildrider, perhaps the most famous of the popular Stunticons, is a psychotic speed demon with absolutely no regard for anything else on the road. Fastlane, an Autobot clone with a very minor appearance in Season 4 of US G1 cartoons, is a thrill-seeking but sane Autobot warrior. I guess this motto makes sense for both of them, but it’s obviously rehashed. Still, now I wonder what would go down in a race between Wildrider and Fastlane. Not only would they be racing for road supremacy, they would be facing off to claim rights to this cloned motto. Oh wait… Fastlane is a clone. So there you go. He cloned this motto from Wildrider. That must be the explanation.

Blurr “The faster it is, the better I like it.”

Quickmix “The faster it is, the better I like it.”

Hasbro is not even trying here. When I was looking through all the mottos for this post, I didn’t think I would find any that are identical to each other. Yet here they are. First we have Blurr, the fast talking Autobot made famous in the G1 Movie. Then we have Quickmix, a Targetmaster that came way too late to matter. So they both like it fast, but apparently in very different ways. Hasbro must be pleased with themselves for recycling this motto verbatim. Did they really think no one would discover this? Ok, maybe nobody noticed back in the 80s. But I am exposing this lazy effort, 28 years later. There is no statute of limitations on blatant copying of another Transformer’s motto. I find you… Innocent! (cue Quintesson creepy judgmental voice)

 

It’s kind of a shame that TFs produced today don’t have mottos on their profiles. But here is one motto that never grows old:
“Transform and Roll Out!”
And in true Hasbro fashion, let’s clone that again:
“Transform and Roll Out!”

It has been more than 3 years since the last edition of Before Carly! So here we go with this long overdue installment of Before Carly 5! On Thanksgiving no less! As always, I will start with what I think was the official description given by Seibertron:

“Spike is quite the ladies man. He eventually married Carly, but she was not the only one to have fun in the backseat of Bumblebee.”

The fictitious name of each girl is made to sound like various characters in the TF universe, and each part of every name is based on real names I’ve seen. See how many TFs you can identify. If a douche like Sam Witwicky (Shia LaBeouf) can score with babes like Mikaela Banes (Megan Fox) and Carly Spencer (Rosie Huntington-Whiteley), then Spike hooking up with all these cuties below is not so far-fetched.

Hover the mouse over each girl’s name to see the name of the TF. You win nothing by correctly identifying them all, but you can take pride in the fact you know so many Transformer names.

Enjoy the pics!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Links to previous posts of Before Carly are below:
Before Carly
Before Carly 2
Before Carly 3
Before Carly 4

Happy Thanksgiving everyone! Transform and Roll Out!

 

I hate reality TV. Some of the things they do on these shows are completely absurd. I also question the supposed realism, as I believe all reality shows are to some extent scripted. Despite my best efforts to avoid them, every so often I find myself watching select seasons or episodes of a show that I normally hate. Reality shows are like junk food. They’re both guilty pleasures that are easy to digest, but leave you with nothing of real value.

I’m cognizant of the fact that reality shows are not going anywhere, and will forever have a place among mainstream TV. I know one guy that really wants to go on Survivor. He applied multiple times, unsuccessfully. Another friend is always saying that he would be good for The Amazing Race, since he travels so much. That would be his show of choice if he was forced to participate in reality TV. He’s always asking me which show I would go on. Honestly, I can’t think of a single show that I would be good for.

Recently news broke out that China is doing a reality show to to recruit Chinese actors for Transformers 4. And all this gets me thinking: which TFs would be good for which shows? I mean, if Transformers came to Earth, some of them would be perfectly suited for some of these lame shows. So perfect that they could easily win, or make themselves stars of the show. Below I present 10 TFs and the show that they should go on.

 
Jazz – Dancing with the Stars
Most TFs don’t dance, but of the few that does, Jazz does it with the most style. In G1, we often see him dance whenever there’s music. And in the 1st Bay movie, we saw Jazz perform a windmill dance move when he first meets Sam and Mikaela. That’s pretty good for someone who just arrived on Earth. If Jazz was to go on Dancing with the Stars, he could give the audience something they’ve never seen before. His robotic body will allow him to perform moves that no human can ever do. Finding a partner for Jazz may prove to be difficult, however.

 
Soundwave – Celebrity Poker Showdown
You want a poker face? You got one in Soundwave. He’s totally unreadable and he gives away nothing, making him the perfect poker player. He’s also got a photographic memory, making counting cards second nature. I like to hear him go “Soundwave Superior” in his robo voice whenever he wins a hand, annoying the hell out of the other players. Shockwave would be good for this too, but I give Soundwave the edge because of one other reason: Soundwave can detect all forms of wave communication, even human brain waves. This means he can read the minds of the other players, and know exactly what they have. Good luck beating Soundwave at poker.

 
Starscream – Big Brother
Starscream was built to be on Big Brother. All the secret alliances, all that back-stabbing, all the drama, and all the house politics, they would all be child’s play to Starscream. For someone that near manipulated his way to Decepticon leadership (and would’ve easily succeeded if Megatron wasn’t around), winning the battles in the Big Brother house would prove almost too easy for the Decepticon air commander. Of course I much rather just see Starscream blast the brains out of some other house guest with his null rays if s/he puts him up for eviction.

 
Bumblebee – Cash Cab
For this to work, I’m thinking of the NYCC Exclusive TF Prime Taxi Cab Bumblebee. And this needs to be a talking Bumblebee, like G1 or War For Cybertron, but preferably more like Animated. That Bumblebee’s got some serious spunk for extra entertainment value. So instead of Ben Bailey driving around NY in his stupid cab, you have Bumblebee driving around doing the same thing. That would be way cooler. Bumblebee would need a hologram driver to attract unsuspecting riders. After they enter, Bumblebee bombards them with true Cybertronian lights and sounds. The game would proceed the same, except Bumblebee asks the questions while driving them to their destination, and it’s all TF trivia. If and when the players get 3 strikes, Bumblebee transforms into robot mode and kicks out the riders to the curb himself.

 
Swindle – The Apprentice
Of all the TFs ever created, Swindle is the only one that is interested in making money as an entrepreneur. And he’s pretty damn good at it. The epitome of the shrewd businessman, Swindle has mastered his craft of war profiteering by being a black market weapons merchant. He has even gone so far as selling the parts of his fellow Combaticons for money. All this makes him the perfect Apprentice for The Donald. As far as I know, Trump is not in the business of war. But that doesn’t mean has hasn’t looked into it, and Swindle would be his perfect partner. Of course Swindle has to first win the “3 month long job interview”. If The Donald ever tries to fire Swindle, I suggest Swindle fire back, literally, with his scatter blaster and destroy that comb-over once and for all.

 
Black Arachnia- America’s Next Top Model
I’ll admit, this is not a show I have watched. I change the channel as soon as it comes on. I rather take a nap than watch a bunch of women compete to be a model. However, if Black Arachnia appeared on the show, that would get my attention. I first thought about putting Arcee on here since she’s the most famous female TF, but she would probably hate being a model. So this gets me thinking about other TFs of the fairer sex, and Black Arachnia came to mind. The feisty female Predacon would enjoy the experience a bit more. It does take some cunning to win these reality competitions, and she’s got more than enough to spare. And if she doesn’t win, it would be entertaining to watch her transform into that giant black widow and watch the other wannabe models freak out.

 
Prowl – Cops
The granddaddy of reality shows just won’t go away. People can’t seem to get enough of Cops. I suggest using some TFs as police officers, and Prowl would be the perfect choice. His alt mode as a police vehicle already does half the job. And being the strict disciplinarian that he is, he probably volunteer for the show. Imagine some local lawbreakers trying to outsmart the police, only to find they are dealing with Prowl! Law enforcement never looked so good. Criminals beware!

 
Grapple – Extreme Makeover: Home Edition
On every episode of this show, some deserving family in poverty gets their house renovated by the Extreme Makeover team. What they come up with is pretty good, but I know how they can do it better: get Grapple on the team! Forget Ty Lawson or Paige Hemmis, you need a real architect who’s good enough to design solar power towers. Grapple’s buildings are considered great works of art on Cybertron, before the war. Designing a house for humans wouldn’t even be a challenge to the famous Autobot architect. Grapple would probably build energy collection modules into the homes for humans, the result being that the family residing there would live in constant fear of a Decepticon attack. Small price to pay for getting a brand new home for free.

 
Nightbeat – Cheaters
Only the most hardcore of G1ers would know about Nightbeat. He is a Headmaster that came in the 5th year of G1. The US G1 animated series already ended by then, so we only got to see him in comics. Anyway, he’s a detective. Why Autobots would even need detectives is beyond me, but his particular skill set gives him plenty of opportunities on Earth. One of those would be a private investigator for Cheaters. All that Autobot technology, reduced to spying on sexual infidelities. And as a Cheaters detective, his Headmaster partner can be Joey Greco. They would drive around day and night (mostly night), following their targets and monitoring their behavior. And when it’s time for “The Confrontation”, imagine the surprise of the cheater when accosted by a giant robot! No man or woman will ever stray again!

 
Grimlock – Master Chef
Grimlock would be horrible on any reality show, including Master Chef. I just want to see him appear on a show where he gets to wear his apron like a chef in training. I can see it now: a big, clumsy robo dino in the studio, wearing the apron and bowtie, knocking over everything and trying to eat all the food. Grimlock’s preferred method of food preparation has gotta be flame broiling, using the flamethrower built into his jaws. Though he’s more likely to burn down the whole studio. He would only attempt to follow directions for so long, before he loses it and makes a mess of everything. Gordon Ramsay may think he can scare all the contestants into submission. Good luck with that with Grimlock around. The famous chef can consider himself lucky if he doesn’t become human BBQ at the end of the show.

 
I will admit that I watch Cheaters if I happen to catch it. But the rest of them, I avoid like the plague. And they are all still running too, as far as I know. They say TV turns your brain to mush, and in the case of reality TV, it’s very true.

Transform and Roll Out.

I have a lot of Transformers. Probably too many by most conventional standards. Space becomes an issue, as I have mentioned repeatedly on this blog. However, there’s another issue, and it’s that you simply don’t have time for all of them. Back in G1, I didn’t get TFs all that often. So I gave every single TF the time it deserved. All my G1 figures were transformed over and over and over. Some of them to the point of having extremely loose joints, while others became straight up broken.

Nowadays, if I transform a figure more than 4 times, I would say I transformed that figure a lot. It’s not that I’m trying to keep the figure mint or anything. I just don’t have the time, and I have too many TFs. Maybe I just need to slow down on buying them. But I enjoy TF hunting too much.

Most figures I will transform at least twice before it gets put in a box somewhere. However, I do have some figures where I only transformed them once. Meaning if they were packed in alt mode, I would transform it to robot, and it stays that way, never even going back to alt mode. Or vice versa. Below is a list of 10 TFs where this has happened. But first some ground rules about my selections:

• The figure must exist on My TF List.
• I must have opened the figure; figures that I purposely keep new do not count.
• I must have owned the figure for more than a year.

So based on these rules, what are my least transformed TFs? Let’s find out. All pics courtesy of Seibertron.com.

 
Highbrow
Series: Hunt for the Decepticons
Allegiance: Autobot
Mode in Package: Robot
Class: Voyager
Highbrow is one of my favorite figures from HftD. I really like the old WWII plane alt mode that he has. Not too many figures in the world of TF has such an alt mode. I documented his purchase back in this post. That was about 2 years ago, so I can now confirm that I have only ever seen this figure once in store. And I hunt a lot. Highbrow is a rare figure indeed. Anyway, I transformed this guy from robot to plane, and it has stayed that way since for about 2 years. Maybe it’s because I like the plane so much better than the robot for this figure. And here’s another funny thing: I did the exact same thing for his redeco, Powerdive. Got him from robot to plane, and he stayed that way on my shelf for about 3 months now. I’m not counting Powerdive as a entry here since I only had him for about 3 months. Both Highbrow and Powerdive are great figures, so I’m hoping I can make some time to transform either one back to robot real soon.

 
Blurr
Series: Animated
Allegiance: Autobot
Mode in Package: Car
Class: Deluxe
Back in this post I outlined my foray into the world of TF Animated. I admit, I did not at all like the Animated look when I first saw the toys. But eventually it kinda grows on you. Anyway, I bought a bunch of used figures from a guy on Craigslist for $80. Blurr was one of them. Almost all the figures in the set was in robot mode when I received them. I have transformed Blurr once to car, but that was it. As I write this, I don’t even have that much recollection of the toy. I just remember the robot being real skinny, transforming him once to a sleek and sexy car, then putting him away. All this happened in a blur (pun intended). But I do remember him being a decent figure, so I might dig him out later and transform him some more.

 
Snarl
Series: Animated
Allegiance: Autobot
Mode in Package: Dinosaur
Class: Deluxe
Snarl was another Animated figure that came with the huge used purchase that I mentioned above for Blurr. And just like Blurr, I received him in robot mode. If I remember right, I got 15 figures total in the used set (a steal for a mere $80). Snarl was one of the figures that I transformed last. And I’m not sure why since I love the Dinobots. Maybe because Grimlock got all the Dinobot love, or maybe because deep down I’m resentful at the fact he’s called Snarl when he should’ve been called Slag. Whatever the reason, I remember I wasn’t all that impressed with the figure. I can’t give concrete reasons though. I just remember him being sub par. Anyway, he was transformed once from robot to dino. That is perhaps not enough time to make a proper evaluation of the figure. So I should maybe give him another chance and transform him again.

 
Ironhide
Series: Dark of the Moon
Allegiance: Autobot
Mode in Package: Robot
Class: Leader
Now for the only Leader class figure on this list. DOTM Leader Ironhide was a figure that I wanted for some time before I was able to locate him in store. When I started buying DOTM toys in the summer of 2011, I was on the lookout to get a Ironhide figure. I almost bought the Voyager version of Ironhide, but then I learned of the Leader class figure. Ironhide would agree that bigger is better, so I had to go Leader class. I transformed him once to truck when I got him, and for reasons that elude me, I never transformed him again. I can’t explain why. I think this is a very solid TF with a robust robot mode and a beefy truck mode, while not being overly difficult to transform for a Leader class fig in the Movie-verse. He’s got some nice gimmicks too. It’s possible I simply like that hefty truck too much, so I just left it like that. I can’t really see myself digging this out anytime soon to transform him either, so I guess he will stay as a truck to who knows when.

 
Sledge
Series: Power Core Combiners
Allegiance: Decepticon
Mode in Package: Robot
Class: N/A
Finally, a Decepticon on this list. I bought Sledge when I was still with my Ex. We were at Target, and of course I had to stop by the TF aisle. Sledge was quite rare at the time, I think I only saw him once before this trip. The Ex really liked the purple Mini-Con, since that’s one of her favorite colors. So I bought Sledge. This is one purchase I wish I could take back. As a general rule, PCCs are crap. My buddy Gemini and I call them Power Crap Combiners. There are exceptions (like Heavytread and Skyhammer), but Sledge is not one of them. He’s crappy for even PCC standards. I transformed him once from robot to excavator and never looked back. In all likelihood, I will never transform Sledge again, unless I have a real good reason. Even if you are forced to play with PCCs, there are better figures in that line to amuse yourself with.

 
Chopsaw
Series: Reveal the Shield
Allegiance: Decepticon
Mode in Package: Robot
Class: Scout
Chopsaw is not a figure I would have normally bought. The only reason I even have him is because I really wanted RTS Scout Class Windcharger. All G1-ers will tell you that RTS Windcharger is an awesome figure that pays perfect homage to the G1 character of the same name. All CHUG fans wanted RTS Windcharger, but for the most part he was nowhere to be found in stores. He was made in extremely limited quantities, and Hasbro was having some serious distribution issues with RTS figures. For me, the only way to get him at MSRP was at BotCon 2011. Hasbro’s not stupid though. They made it so that Windcharger must be purchased in a set with 5 other figures. And it’s not like there’s a discount. That was one way for Hasbro to unload shelf-warmers at MSRP. Anyway, Chopsaw is one figure in that set. I outlined that purchase in this post. To be fair, Chopsaw is a nifty little figure. He’s got a wacky robot mode, but the motorcycle alt mode ain’t half bad. I could see myself play with this figure some more. Not a priority though.

 
Backfire
Series: Hunt for the Decepticons
Allegiance: Autobot
Mode in Package: Robot
Class: Scout
Here is another figure that I would not usually buy. Again, this is another fig as part of the set that was forced on you in order to acquire Windcharger. I’m not really a big fan of this figure. In fact, out of that set of 6, Backfire is by far the worst figure IMO. Some fans may like him, but not me. It has been speculated that this figure is an homage to Cy-Kill from the GoBots. Probably because of the motorcycle alt mode and the colors. They may be right, I dunno. I could maybe see a customizer turning this into Cy-Kill. But I know this: Backfire sucks. I transformed him once and I see no further pleasure from doing it again. Only play as a last resort.

 
Backfire
Series: Dark of the Moon
Allegiance: Autobot
Mode in Package: Robot
Class: Basic Human Alliance
Two Backfires on the same list?! Say it ain’t so! I guess with a name like Backfire, everything you do is destined to fail. But seriously, DOTM Backfire is not too shabby. I think he’s one of the better Basic Human Alliance figures. Well, technically, I don’t know if calling them Basic HA is accurate. Human Alliance figures only come in two sizes. They started out doing only larger ones, usually slightly bigger than a Voyager figure. Then they started doing these smaller ones that are somewhere between a Scout and Deluxe. Kinda like PCC size. Regardless, Backfire is one of the better smaller ones. My favorite Basic HA would probably be Sandstorm and Half-Track. If I were to pick a 2nd favorite, it probably be Backfire. I like his robot mode, and I really like his ATV alt mode. This alt mode comes together quite well, and the human figure can sit on him just fine. I went into HA figures in this post, and I just realized now I bought Backfire and some other smaller HAs after that. I could see myself digging out Backfire later and transforming him some more, if only to play with that ATV.

 
Elita-One
Series: Transformers (2007 Movie)
Allegiance: Autobot
Mode in Package: Motorcycle
Class: Scout
Here is the only female figure to appear on this list. When I was compiling this, I started looking at my TF list to find the figures that were barely transformed. I don’t know why, but all of a sudden it hit me, I have Elita-One from the 1st Movie! She was a Target exclusive. I guess I got her because I have never seen Hasbro make figures of Elita-One, and this is a character that only hardcore G1-ers like myself would recognize, so I had to have her. However as a toy, she must’ve been unmemorable. I say that because, prior to this post, I didn’t even have her on my TF List! So I had to add her to the list first before publishing this. I don’t have much recollection of the figure. She must be a repaint of something, I just don’t know what. In fact, on Seibertron, I see 8 redecos of this mold. I’ll reserve my thoughts about the figure after I dig her out and transform her some more, since what I can recall is hazy at best. But I do remember transforming her only once, from bike to robot. That in itself cannot be a good sign. Heck, the fact that I forgot to include her in the TF list is a really bad sign. But who knows, taste change. My taste in women have changed over the years, so maybe in female TFs too? LOL.

 
Soundwave
Series: Generations, War For Cybertron
Allegiance: Decepticon
Mode in Package: Robot
Class: Deluxe
I saved the best for last. Here is a figure I’m embarrassed to have on this list. Soundwave is one of my all time favorite characters. So why would I even have a figure of Soundwave where I only transformed him once? I can’t explain it. Sometimes you rarely transform a figure because they’re too difficult, or maybe one mode is significantly better than the other so you just leave them in that mode, or its such a crappy figure that you don’t want to transform it anymore. WFC Deluxe Soundwave shares none of these faults. I’m guessing this figure must have been released when many other figures flooded the shelves, or he simply came around at a time in my life when there was too much going on. But whatever the reason, I need to dig out Soundwave and transform him some more. I remember transforming him only once, from robot to car. If memory serves, I was impressed with both modes. Now would be a good time to compare this figure with the Voyager figure from FOC. I think they each got their strengths, but I’ll know after I have them stand side by side. Apparently it’s also possible to have this Soundwave transform into a Cybertronian boombox. Not sure if that’s official or a fan creation, but I’m eager to try it.

 
So these are my least transformed Transformers. As I look at this list, some things come to mind. Six of these figures are from Movie lines, or Movie sub lines. I guess this finding does not surprise me. Only one figure falls into CHUG, and that’s WFC Soundwave. I would have been real surprised if this list were full of CHUG figures. Also, four figures transform into motorcycles. Maybe one some level, I don’t enjoy motorcycle transformers.

There are only 3 Decepticons on here. I’m pretty sure I don’t discriminate based on faction. Maybe they just make a lot more Autobots. If I get really bored one of these days, I’ll go through my TF list and count.

The good news in all this is that I don’t have any TFs where I opened and never transformed. I have heard of some TransFans complain about this phenomenon. I hope it never happens to me.

What are your least transformed TFs? Feel free to comment below.

Transform and Roll Out!

The time has come for another exciting round of Before Carly! As always, I will start by what I think was the official description given by Seibertron:

“Spike is quite the ladies man. He eventually married Carly, but she was not the only one to have fun in the backseat of Bumblebee.”

The name of each girl is made to sound like various characters in the TF universe, and each part of every name is based on real names I’ve seen. See how many TFs you can identify while you contemplate how does a geek like Spike get his freak on with all these babes. My theory is Perceptor was able to use Autobot technology to isolate some unknown human pheromones and Spike put those to use the best way he knows how.

Frequent users of WordPress.com will tell you that all JavaScript is locked out. Some fancy DHTML tags are also locked out. This forced me to use a lame way to reveal the name of the TF in previous editions of Before Carly (links appear below). However, CSS still works so I was able to leverage it to build a more intuitive way to reveal the answer. Hover the mouse over each girl’s name to see the name of the TF. Enjoy!
 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Links to previous posts of Before Carly are below:
Before Carly
Before Carly 2
Before Carly 3

Transform and Roll Out!